481 Days to SW EP9 – A Real Conversation Between Two Sandtroopers Stationed on Tatooine

PAGE 1 Four horizontal panels. http://www.comicbookpaper.com/comic/?title=cp76 PANEL 1 Title, wide horizontal. A tusken raider is perched on a rocky ledge. He is sighting down a long rifle at a very distant target. NARRATOR A real conversation between two Sandtroopers stationed on Tatooine. PANEL 2 Horizontal Establishing shot of two stormtroopers standing at attention in a desert scene. Could have background elements including tents/barracks, dewbacks, sand volleyball, etc. NARRATOR Sandtrooper ML-547 ML-547 Aw Nerfdwang! NARRATOR Sandtrooper DJ-184 DJ-184 What’s wrong? PANEL 3 Horizontal Pull in to the two troopers, roughly chest-up. ML-547 I just realized we’re not on Dewback patrol tomorrow. DJ-184 Aw ACES! I still can't get used to the smell of Dewback. PANEL 4 Big and wide Full-view shot of the ITT. Troopers are getting into the side compartments. Possible actions: high-fiving, one helping another into the compartment, one slid out of his and is dazed on the ground. ML-547 Narrative Box Yeah, BUT if we’re not on Dewbackback, that means we’re riding on an Imperial Troop Transporter. PAGE 2 http://www.comicbookpaper.com/comic/?title=cp186 PANEL 1 Square DJ-184 What’s the big deal? Beats walking! ML-547 I'll tell you what the big deal is: CG-017. PANEL 2 Square DJ-184 R.I.P. ML-547 You got that right. DJ-184 What's CG-017 got to do with riding the ITT? Did he get run over? PANEL 3 Wide panel CG-017's helmet and head explode from a sniper shot. B&W "flashback" style. ML-547 Narrative Box You were out sick last time. CG-017 took a Tusken Raider sniper shot right to the beelpop. DJ-184 Narrative Box How'd that happen? PANEL 4 Square ML-547 If we’re on an ITT, that means six of us have to hang out "side- saddle" while the officers ride in the cockpit. DJ-184 Oh. Crap. PANEL 5 Square ML-547 Yup. You can't even duck. Easier targets than womprats. DJ-184 Womprats? PAGE 3 http://www.comicbookpaper.com/comic/?title=cp75 PANEL 1 Wide panel of a Womprat. Demonstrate that it is two meters. ML-547 Narrative Box Yeah, this planet is infested with them. They're the slowest, fattest, easiest-to-shoot rodents in the Tatoo system. DJ-184 Narrative Box Wow, you really know this planet. PANEL 2 Square ML-547 Hence the saying, “Like bullseying womprats in a T-16.” DJ-184 <blink blink> PANEL 3 Square DJ-184 What’s a bulls eye? ML-547 Not sure. PANEL 4 Large wide DJ-184 Narrative Box Ohhhhh, the T16… The vehicle known the galaxy over for having the most dummy-proof targeting assistance system ever built. I always wondered about that saying. PAGE 4 http://www.comicbookpaper.com/comic/?title=cp50 PANEL 1 ML-547 Yeah, they practically fly themselves. I'm not even sure why you have to go to an academy to get a license. PANEL 2 DJ-184's helmet bursts open in a shower of blood. ML-547 recoils in horror. PANEL 3 Tusken raiders wave their gaffi sticks in the air with victorious glee. PANEL 4 A pack of womp rats sniff the air in attention. PANEL 5 An empty, bloody helmet rolls down an incline, leaving a trail in the sand. PANEL 6 A dewback snickers in grunting huffs. DEWBACK Hurfff-urff-urff* NARRATOR *Now THAT'S a Hard Cheap Knock! PANEL 7 Wide ML-547 Nothing good ever happens on this fucking planet.
The majority of the art for this post was created while enjoying beers at Chicago’s Beermiscuous.
Reference Attribution
August 26, 2018 @ 1:56 am
“Aaaaaaawwwrrrrk! Aaaaaaawwwrrrrk!
August 26, 2018 @ 8:56 am
Good.