Kool Klench Bath Buddies A

This senior woke up with a fungal infection covering over 100% of his body. What happened next will make your G.D. jaw drop. Kool Klench™ Bath Buddies™

Kool Klench Bath Buddies A

– He took a bath with Kool Klench™ Bath Buddies™ Bath Pellets™ and his fungal infection™ was reduced by over 8% immediately four days later! His wife Mergaline  said, “I have no idea where it came from, I don’t know anything about it, I was downstairs watching Merican Ninjer Warrior.”

Ask your doctor if Kool Klench™ is right for you. Possible side effects include: dizziness, drowsiness, insomnia, nausea and vomiting, redness or rash that is definitely not fungal in nature, more like you were washing dishes with old latex gloves that have been wet inside for like a week, hungry eyes, twinkle toes, hard body, baby face, hot lips, dragon breath, dog bone underarms, woah, yikes, ham fist, butcher foot, about face, chicken fingers, totally completely unsalted nuts, waffle tongue, appetite for sucking on your wet shirt, one eye is seeing what the other should see, and vice-versa,  – same thing with the nostrils, but get this: the ears are doing the same thing the notstrils are, so, hearing loss, fungal infection, middle finger, follicle reversal, eleven fingernails, weezer.

Bernard Carson

(Former) Chief Tech, Business and Spirituality Editor for Blood Lust Digest.
(Former) Head of the Sandwhich Station at the Black Dung Township Angelo’s Italian Restaurant.
Answerer of the 5th Unknown Question.
Founder and 13th Level Grand Maxiform Valuator of Omnichon Superionics, which is not a cult. IT’S NOT A CULT

4 Comments

  1. Matthew Langland
    September 2, 2016 @ 9:54 pm

    Thank you Mr. Carson and all your colleagues for this witty publication and for the use we’ve all been able to put it to. Do you know my brother Dunkin I think he lives in your building he owes me 18 dollar

    Reply

    • Bernard Carson
      September 2, 2016 @ 9:55 pm

      Dear Mr. Langland, thank you very much for your insightful comment. I can’t remember anything. Can’t tell if this is true or dream. Deep down inside I feel to scream. This terrible silence stops me. Now that the war is through with me, I’m waking up, I cannot see. That there’s not much left of me. Nothing is real but pain now. Hold my breath as I wish for death. Oh please, God, wake me. Back in the womb it’s much too real. In pumps life that I must feel. But can’t look forward to reveal, look to the time when I’ll live. Fed through the tube that sticks in me. Just like a wartime novelty, tied to machines that make me be, cut this life off from me. Hold my breath as I wish for death. Oh please, God, wake me.

      Yo, yo, yo, yo, baby-pop. Yeah, you come here, gimme a kiss. Better make it fast or else I’m gonna get pissed. Can’t you hear the music’s pumpin’ hard like I wish you would?

      Now the world is gone, I’m just one. Oh God, help me. Hold my breath as I wish for death. Oh please, God, help me.

      Yo, yo, yo, yo, baby-pop. Yeah, you come here, gimme a kiss. Better make it fast or else I’m gonna get pissed. Can’t you hear the music’s pumpin’ hard like I wish you would?

      Darkness
      Imprisoning me
      All that I see
      Absolute horror
      I cannot live
      I cannot die
      Trapped in myself
      Body my holding cell

      Push it good
      Push it real good
      Push it good
      P-push it real good

      Landmine
      Has taken my sight
      Taken my speech
      Taken my hearing
      Taken my arms
      Taken my legs
      Taken my soul
      Left me with life in hell

      Push it good
      P-push it real good
      Ah, push it
      Ah, push it

      Reply

  2. Matthew Langland
    September 2, 2016 @ 9:56 pm

    Ok can I borrow 18 dollars

    Reply

  3. Craig Gunderson
    September 2, 2016 @ 10:36 pm

    Push One REAL GOOD!

    Reply

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