Did you know 1 out of 87 people has been punched in the butt? And a staggering 3,500 a year report witnessing a butt punch sometime in their life before the age of 43. It’s scary and frightening at the same time. We do not need to live in a world where punching a butt is so carelessly treated as the “norm”. Hello. I’m celebrity look-a-like wax figurine, BraWax Pitt.
Butt punching isn’t a game. Some call it “splittin’ the cheeks” Or “the ol’ fanny whap”. Or “I just saw a VW with its trunk open and you didn’t so with all things being even, bring me your butt to be punched.” And it’s just not cool. Striking someone in either the left or right buttocks cheek is downright pointless if not rude. Just like a pair of Wetpants®. Sadly most butt punching stories come from someone you kinda know. Like the mailman or a TJ Max employee. Agists agree that this “phenomenon” started in the early 30’s before WWll as a way to pass the time. Thanks a lot, Herbert Hoover. This was under your watch!
Let’s just stop. Put those fists down. Lower your clenched hands. And just let butts be.
December is Butt Punching Awareness month. Make sure you tie a plaid ribbon somewhere.